Dvr H.Adler PAL/30765
650 Gen Trpt Coy.
R.A.S.C.
M.E.F

14 December

I have just received a letter from you little one. It was written on Friday and today is Monday. That shows you how quickly your letters your letters reach me, that is to say how ridiculously small is the distance that separates us! It is six days since I found myself so close to you darling. However!  However I haven’t yet been able to find a way of coming to see you, my sweet Yvette. This is the third letter I have written to you from my new “residence”. Each time, and now too, I have said the same thing. I say to you:” Here I am, I am here” and I don’t come. Which means that my torture continues always increases.  Which means that I am still alone. Thinking unbearably and entirely only of you alone. I think by day and I dream by night of my darling little wife who I love so passionately, of you darling, of you Yvette. I am full of you and the air and sky is filled with you. I have lots of free time. So I see you very very often. I see your loving look that good, warm look which quite transforms me— I want to plunge myself entirely in it.  Everything about me advertises it and my listlessness is such, you know, that tightens the heart and the throat, but is not content with so little and constantly attacks the head and reduces it to a simple function of my most beautiful Yvette. TO be so near to you and not to be able to take you in my arms, Yvette, Yvette, do you realise the unhappiness and the anger that raises in me.

I want you darling. I want you violently and sweetly. I want to live with you and I want nothing else. For everything else will naturally be easy when I am with you, Yvette. That’s the truth. And I don’t give a hang for those who see weakness I this frank avowal. I, my love, see there my strength.

Understand me darling and don’t judge me badly. You see, I am more and more conscious of the fact that from now on I will no longer know how to do anything useful without having you near to me. And on the contrary, when I will have you near to me, oh my God, my God, I will know how to do more than I have every done in al my past life. Is that weakness? It’s all the same to me. In fact I am fed up with playing the intellectual and uselessly employing the scalpel on my own flesh.  It is sufficient for me – and it must be sufficient for everyone- that this is how it is, and I assure you darling that there is no consideration and no power with the weight to change this state of affairs. Do you think that I feel bad about that? Not at all. On the contrary my happiness is immense when I consider what a sweet person, what a beautiful, intelligent and loving woman has become completely mine.

Dear little one of mine, I love you, I want you, I am rich and strong with you, poor and feeble without you. I need you quite simply to live.

You said in your last letter that you are always discovering something new in me. But yes, darling, you will discover a lot more. Of good and beautiful. Of ugly and wicked too, without doubt. You could also see me much sadder than you have ever seen me. You might see me joyous and mischievous like a charming little youngster. You might see me serious and coldly logical, coping with difficult problems. You might see me also judging superficially some pretty grave things.

But Yvette darling, what you will never never see is Henry able to live without you. Don’t be indignant because I have said this to you. Your indignation, at least in this case, can result from an immediate and unthinking reaction. But you are intelligent.   I have said something serious to you. Something well thought about. When you think deeply about it, doesn’t it frighten you a bit, this so powerful love? Not me. I am happy about it.  I am in such great haste to see you darling, to caress you and embrace you. I want to stretch out close to you and in the dark murmur things that you don’t suspect.  Today is Monday. I will try to get a “week end leave” [English] for this Saturday afternoon. I pray to all the Gods that I will succeed. If not, there is still the long marriage leave [English]. And that is not so far away. As I see it your C.O. will receive the news from my C.O. some time this week. But can you tell me, darling, what plan you have made for our week or two of happiness? Or better, don’t make any plans at all. We will do what our two hearts desire. I will finish this letter darling, which I thought would be something else.

Some comrades need me and I must go.

Don’t take too much notice of my chattering today. Accept this letter as a simple sign of my life. Do I often say silly thing in my letters? That’s odd, as I don’t like my letters at all. Everything I write vielle maladie.

Darling darling little Yvette, I love you, my sweet, I love you Yvette. Say that you feel my heart beating so tenderly for you. I love you.

Henri.